Ep 231: Vincia’s Birth Story – The Second Baby Comes Faster, a LOT Faster

Dr. Nicole (00:00): I have heard and been a part of so, so many birth stories, but I have never heard a birth story quite like this one. Welcome to the All about Pregnancy and birth podcast. I'm Dr. Nicole Callaway Rankins, a board certified OBGYN, who's been in practice for nearly 15 years. I've had the privilege of helping over 1000 babies into this world, and I'm here to help you be calm, confident, and empowered to have a beautiful pregnancy and birth. Quick note, this podcast is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical advice. Check out the full disclaimer at drnicolerankins.com/disclaimer. Now let's get to it.

(00:56): Hello there. Welcome to another episode of the podcast. This is episode number 231. Whether you are a new listener or a returning listener, you know I am so glad you're spending some of your time with me today. In this episode, we have Vincia. Vincia is a mom of two living in the suburbs of Chicago with her husband Adam, their son Adam, and their baby girl Adelyn. We're going to hear Adeline's birth story today, vincia balances, or at least attempts to balance. She says, A full-time career. As an administrative leader in healthcare with being a mom through her career, she's able to fulfill her passion of ensuring that all patients receive compassionate and quality care, and in her personal life, she enjoys doing the same for moms. By being part of the support community we all need and deserve. I love it. Mencias second birth was unexpectedly true to the definition of a precipitous labor leading to her husband delivering her daughter In less than three hours from her first contraction at home, she wanted to share her birth story and give women a glimpse into what the second baby may come faster really looks like.

(02:09): This was so different than her first experience. Her first baby was born two days after the expected due date. She went through 36 hours of labor, eight hours Medicaid with Pitocin and an epidural. She was dreaming the second time around of 15 hours of labor or less. That would've felt great for her. She never could have imagined that it was going to be less than three hours from her first contraction to her baby being born. They had totally planned for a hospital birth. Their bags were packed, childcare were secured, and she says the car was warm, but her daughter just seemed to have very different plans. Thankfully, she felt like this podcast, my birth preparation course, which is my online childbirth education class, and her experience from her first birth armed her and her husband with the knowledge they needed to stay calm and prepared during the birth of their daughter, you are really going to love this story.

(03:09): Now, as I mentioned, she and her husband took the birth preparation course, which is my signature online childbirth education class that helps you get calm, confident and empowered to have the beautiful birth that you deserve. Now, I believe every person having a baby must do childbirth education. This is so, so important. It is a hill I will die on. It helps you to understand the things that are happening in your body, be prepared for the things that may come your way. So everybody needs childbirth education. Of course, you can check out the birth preparation course, which is my childbirth education class is completely online. You can check it out at drnicolerankins.com/enroll. But there are lots of options out there. You just need to find something that works for you, but do not skip it. And if you want to get a taste of what the birth preparation course is like before hopping into the course, you can check out my free birth plan class, which is make a birth plan the right way. It'll help set you up for success as well. Lay that great foundation for you to make a birth plan that actually works to help you have the birth that you want. That class is completely free now. You can check it out at drnicolerankins.com/birth plan. All right, let's get into the birth story with Vincia.

(04:27): Thank you so much, Vincia for agreeing to come onto the podcast. I am. So I can't wait to hear this story that we are going to hear today.

Vincia (04:36): Yes, very excited to share it.

Dr. Nicole (04:38): Yeah, so why don't you start off by telling us a bit about yourself and your family?

Vincia (04:42): Yes. My name is Vincia. I live, well, I'm from Chicago now, live in the suburbs of Chicago. I work full-time in clinic operations. So in healthcare I live with my husband. I have a two year old son, Adam, and then my daughter just turned eight months not too long ago, and her name is Adelyn. And then we also kidnapped my husband's parents to help us with childcare. So my mother-in-Law and Father-in-Law live with us as well.

Dr. Nicole (05:13): Oh, well, that's nice. That's nice to have built-in childcare.

Vincia (05:16): Yes.

Dr. Nicole (05:16): Yeah. So in order to understand what happened with the birth, I always like to talk a bit about what happened with the pregnancy. So what was your pregnancy and prenatal care?

Vincia (05:25): So with the pregnancy of my daughter, I figured out I'm one of those people that find out they're pregnant the second that it happens, because I actually wasn't menstruating at the time in which I got pregnant with her.

(05:40): I Had taken a pregnancy test on a Friday. I donate blood until, that was kind of like my check

(05:46): Back, not pregnant. The next day I felt really tired and I was like, oh, it must just be a long week. I'll drink an energy drink walking around. And I was like, well, no, this isn't right. Took a pregnancy test, that one came back positive, so then reached out to schedule an appointment. Through that time, they're asking, when was your last cycle? I think I had one maybe in December.

Dr. Nicole (06:14): ok

Vincia (06:14): So I mentioned that this is around April, and so they're kind of freaking out. They're like, you're at least 12 weeks pregnant. I'm like, no, I'm pretty sure that I'm not. And so it's kind of that where they're like, we think you need to come in earlier and back and forth. When I get there. Actually couldn't even tell that it didn't show up on the urine test there.

Dr. Nicole (06:35): ok

Vincia (06:36): So then I had to move forward with having blood tests done, which officially stated that we were expecting her. So that took probably around four weeks until we got in, and ultrasound was even a little bit earlier, probably around five weeks. But with that, it was pretty normal care post then, except for I was considered high risk. We weren't necessarily planning, and I was still breastfeeding my son at the time, and so my BMI was borderline what would be considered high risk. So I did have one maternal fetal ultrasound where they declared that everything was fine. I kind of made sure that I was watching how much weight I gained during that pregnancy, and so my blood pressure was stable weight gain. I didn't really gain much during this pregnancy just because I was aware of the risk associated with it. And then I did have to get stress tests towards the end. It was a little bit of weird because some doctors treated me as though I was like, my pregnancy was normal, my previous pregnancy was normal, and then other ones kind of always had this higher intensity when it came to things. Of course, I kind of preferred the ones that treated me as though what was in, if there was a concern, I would understand. But since there wasn't, it was a very strange experience. I remember one doctor told me that she wouldn't let me go over 38 weeks and six days, and I was like, what do you mean by that?

Dr. Nicole (08:08): Hold on.

Vincia (08:09): Right. I was like, I went full term with my son.

(08:12): I'm not showing any signs of risk in

(08:15): this current pregnancy. And so when I asked her more questions, she kind of was like, well, just the risk go up due to BMI and things like that. And I'm like, yes, but there are other factors that we need to be considering here. Okay,

Dr. Nicole (08:29): Yeah, I can imagine how that would be. So you saw different doctors than every visit?

Vincia (08:35): Yes. We had to see every doctor that's within the practice.

Dr. Nicole (08:40): Okay. How many doctors were there?

Vincia (08:42): I believe I saw about at least five to six. A couple of them, I kind of had my favorites, and so I would kind of double book, go around a couple more times with them than some of the others.

Dr. Nicole (08:52): Gotcha, gotcha. Overall, did feel good about the care other than that instance? Of course,

Vincia (08:58): Yes. I feel as though, at least the ones that I felt comfortable with asking questions, they always answered my questions. I felt supported. Even the MFM doctor, that could be very scary to go to when you're hearing that, okay, you're high risk, you need to go through these things. And it was very reassuring. He kind of came in and he's like, okay, everything looks good. You're good to go. We can move forward with your care as normal. So that was relieving.

Dr. Nicole (09:26): Good, good, good. And then I assume they said you would get whatever doctor who you get for the

Vincia (09:32): Birth? Yes.

(09:33): Alright. Yeah. Any doctor that you get went through that same thing with my son. And it's funny, I met everyone in the group and he was delivered by the laborist.

Dr. Nicole (09:42): Okay. So there you go. Now, is this the same group that you went to for your first pregnancy?

Vincia (09:48): Yes.

Dr. Nicole (09:49): Okay. Gotcha, gotcha. And then I want to go back for a second about your periods. Were they always irregular or is it because you were breastfeeding or just

Vincia (09:59): Yes. I'm thinking because I was breastfeeding one of those people where I'm consistently regular. I can probably tell you when it's coming the day before. So when it came back in December and I was like, is this it? Is it not? And then it disappeared for a few more months and I'm like, oh, maybe because I'm still breastfeeding. I did breastfeed my son up until he was 17 months, so I think around four months pregnant, he kind weaned himself. I'm guessing maybe my milk changed because one day he got up and fed and the next day he's like, this is not interesting.

Dr. Nicole (10:35): Oh, well, that's an accomplishment to breastfeed for 17 months. That is not an easy thing to do. Yeah, yeah. All right. So then, or I should say, what did you do to prepare for the birth this time around?

Vincia (10:48): So I went back to listen to the podcast. I even went back in some previous episodes that I felt helped me in the first pregnancy, just like what to expect since I was high risk, this pregnancy due to weight. I did go back and listen to a couple of those to see, okay, what does it mean for this pregnancy? What are the risks? What are the things that I need to be mindful of? I also did have a doula this pregnancy as well, and so she helped with education and concerns.

Dr. Nicole (11:17): What made you decide to get a doula this time?

Vincia (11:19): So I actually had one with my son, and so after that, that kind of sealed the deal for me that I wanted that person and my birth, actually, my son, I was pregnant in 2020, had him in 2021.

(11:31): So one of the things that was important to me, especially during that time was that I had someone in the room that looked like me and my husband and my son, and so I wanted to feel fully supported in that aspect. And so I did have a doula for that reason. Our doula was amazing the first time around where my husband's now a spokesperson for doulas. He tells people all the time, get yourself a doula. Yes. He's like, you need a doula. I see him pulling husbands aside when we're a baby shop. He get

(12:05): Need to go

Dr. Nicole (12:05): Ahead and get your doula. Yeah.

Vincia (12:08): So the point with this doula, he's like, because my other doula, she had moved away to another state, and so with this doula, he's looking, he's like, well, is she doing this? I feel like we're doing this at this point.

Dr. Nicole (12:22): I love it. Built in advertisement. All right. So you decided you were going to have a doula and she had education. Did you pick her pretty early in the pregnancy or at what point?

Vincia (12:31): I picked her pretty early. Probably around three months is when I picked her, just because I knew my original doula wasn't available, and so I wanted to start interviewing people and trying to build that bond earlier on, because I think that's what kind of made the first time around, even though that was a very long labor, knowing that person's in your space and with you during very hard time, that relationship building I think is really important.

Dr. Nicole (12:55): Yeah, for sure. For sure. And then what else did you do to prepare

Vincia (12:59): And then ask questions of my doctors. I read books the first time, so I didn't actually go back to those like, okay, I kind of know

(13:07): What's to expect. One thing that I did that my doula encouraged was to think about my previous birth, what things I wanted to do differently, and then how did I feel during those experiences, what things made me feel good, what things didn't, which allowed me to prepare myself for this delivery.

Dr. Nicole (13:28): Gotcha. And was there anything that didn't go well that you wanted to change this time around?

Vincia (13:32): Yes. So this time I wanted to stay home longer. I thought I stayed home long enough the first time, but we didn't. And one of the reasons my husband was, he's like, okay, he's watching the clock and he's like, okay, they're this many minutes apart. Have to go home. We have to go to the hospital right now. Versus I could kind of tell, I was like, well, they're not strong yet, but he was like, okay, let's go. And I'm like, okay, he

Dr. Nicole (13:59): Was just feeling a bit nervous.

Vincia (14:01): So he was nervous, and I was like, okay, I understand. I'm also nervous. This is the first time that I've done this, so let's go. So we got to the hospital. I was only around four centimeters dilated, and once I got there, it was also 3:00 AM in the morning. So everyone was kind of tired once we were there for a while. It's the weird shift that comes in and out throughout the night. And so at one point they asked me about a C-section, and I was confused about where that question was coming. I, I feel like things are progressing

(14:39): Their own. And then later on, the hospitalist, he came in at probably 7:00 AM

(14:48): And so I think I had dilated a little bit, but not much. And so he's like, well, you can either go home or you can't, or we'll need to induce you. And so I'm like, well, I've been at this for over 24 hours, I don't think I want to go. But I was like, well, can we have a little bit of time for an induction? And then he said, okay. So he gave us time to talk about it. And then with a part of that, that was Pitocin. I did enough research and to know that Pitocin contractions are a lot stronger.

(15:21): So with that, I made the decision that I was going to get an epidural before moving forward with the Pitocin. Just got it so that I could allow myself to relax. It also didn't help that I looked over and my husband was napping, and I'm like, okay, as everyone else gets to nap, nap, I would also like some of that because I would say one of my fears is having to push for a long time and becoming exhausted. I know that leads to a whole nother layer of things. So it's like, well, if I am going to get induced, these constructions are going to get stronger. I at least want to be able to relax and rest so that I can be ready for the actual vaginal delivery. So I did that, took a nap, woke up from the nap, and I thought they had put something in my bed to keep me from falling out. And so I'm poking it and I'm like, okay, what? I was like, this is kind of warm. That's nice of them. Was I moving a lot?

Dr. Nicole (16:17): Right?

Vincia (16:18): I pull the sheet down, it's my leg. I was like, okay. Okay, there we go. So the epidural works.

Dr. Nicole (16:28): Yes.

Vincia (16:31): They didn't put me on a continuous one. He said once I started to fill things to call them back, I didn't call 'em back. Cause I was like, okay, these are manageable. I started to progress pretty quickly to the point that they had to come down and kind of turn it down. During that time, we realized that I couldn't lay on my right side, so when I laid on my right side, there was some concerns. So they had to make sure I was on the other side. That all started probably around 10:00 AM when epidural Pitocin, and then they came in, my water still hadn't broke, but when they checked, he looked and he's like, well, you look like you're right about close to 10 centimeters. And I had said that I wanted my waters to break naturally. And so he's like, well, I can't check you. If I check you, then I'm going to rupture your water. And so I'm like, okay, that's fine. I'll wait and we'll see. Then he came back probably 15 minutes later and he's like, well, okay, I'm going to check you. And I was like, well, you just told me that

(17:32): You weren't going to, so he went and checked, and then I felt his hand come out. I kind of let it wear off where I could feel things because I wouldn't be able to feel the pressure. They kept asking me if I felt like I had to poop, and I'm like, I don't know.

Dr. Nicole (17:47): Right? And

Vincia (17:49): So I'm like, okay, maybe I should see if I can feel things. So I let it wear off and I felt his hand go in to check, and then it came out and then he kind of went back in and ruptured it. And I'm like, I don't think you realize that I'm not as numb as you think I am. And then he's like, okay, I think we're ready to go pushing. So I was kind of upset because I'm like, we had this conversation. I thought we were on the same page.

(18:13): Then that happened. And then the only other thing that I didn't enjoy was that, so they asked me to do a practice push.

(18:23): My first time pushing ever. So I did the practice push and right after they start listing out all of the possible interventions. And so it's like, okay, vacuum and biceps and this, and I'm like, okay. And so I stopped and I'm like, okay, but did I do something wrong?

Dr. Nicole (18:42): Why are we, right

Vincia (18:44): We are going directly into, and then all these things are happening. I'm like, okay, I did not want that. Again, I know that we have to get my consent, let's get that earlier on into this process. Versus as soon as I push, it's like,

Dr. Nicole (18:57): And then all of a sudden, yeah, I'm

Vincia (18:59): Like, did I do something wrong? Is this what's happening here? But then with my son, luckily it was probably about three contractions, so maybe about 10, 15 minutes he was out.

Dr. Nicole (19:12): Okay. Okay. So pretty fast. So pretty fast for your first one. So for this one, did you want to, for the second one, did you not want an epidural or did you see you wanted to stay home as long as possible? What other things about that that you wanted to be different second time around?

Vincia (19:35): So I did want to try a medication free birth this time around just because I felt as though in the beginning my contractions weren't something that I was in immense pain that I wouldn't have been able to get through. I was like, let's try this route, but I know if I need it, it's available and I'm okay with having it. I want it to feel more comfortable with my care team. And things that were being suggested

(20:02): Me was really important, especially having more education and say, okay, this is how I felt with this happened. Let's make sure that we don't go this route. So they were both meeting our needs. I wanted to move around more because I felt as though I was in the bed for a while, my son's labor, even though my actual delivery was quick, I was in labor for about 36 hours. So I was like, if I get half of that, then I'm golden. I can do this.

Dr. Nicole (20:31): Right, right. Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. Okay. Okay. And then was there anything that you were afraid of for the birth?

Vincia (20:40): I think there's always that fear of what can happen that escalates to an emergency that lingers. I did tear the first time around with my son. It was a second degree tear, and so I was worried that the progression of tearing that can sometimes happen. And so I was like, okay, I hope that I don't come out of here with a third degree tear since I had a second tear the first time.

Dr. Nicole (21:05): Okay. Okay. Okay. So getting to your labor and birth, which was quite different. See, I already know the ending of it. So you said the first one was 36 hours. Talk us through what happened with the second labor and birth.

Vincia (21:22): Yes. So remember how I was saying I wish that it was half the time I kind of narrowed that down even further. I think it was a little under three hours total.

Dr. Nicole (21:33): Okay. So what happened?

Vincia (21:35): Yes. So the night before, it's funny, I had a do, and so we were talking about having to set up possible backup doula interviews the next day, just it seemed as though I was going to go past my due date,

(21:50): Like that, just starting to make those arrangements for a while. I was like, people didn't tell me the truth about the second child. They was like, oh, the second one comes so fast in my head I'm like, oh, that means that she'll come a little bit sooner than 40 weeks since I'm like, Nope, still pregnant.

Dr. Nicole (22:09): Still

Vincia (22:09): Pregnant.

Dr. Nicole (22:10): Right. So did you make it all the way to your due date

Vincia (22:12): The day before? So I was actually due December 26th. And so there's also the thing of where I didn't want to be in the hospital on Christmas, and so I was really hoping that what they were saying was true. And she'd come sooner a

Dr. Nicole (22:24): Little bit earlier,

Vincia (22:25): But she actually came on Christmas Eve. But once I gave up a lot of that carrying on, I knew that babies come when they come, but I was really set on not having a baby on Christmas or baby in the hospital near Christmas. But once I kind of let that go, maybe that's where things started to move, because I remember sitting on my ball, bouncing, setting everything up. I'm like, okay, fine. I'll just accept it. I'm going to just be pregnant forever.

(22:56): I did all of that, started making our plans for Christmas. Eve, went to bed. I woke up probably at about 1240 and I was like, oh, is this something? But it wasn't intense. It just felt like, okay, maybe something's starting.

(23:11): because With my son, I kind of saw everything and mucus plug started filling the contractions that they picked up with my daughter, no signs of anything happening at all.

(23:24): And so I woke up at probably around 1240 in the morning and I'm like, oh, I feel like maybe that's a contraction. Maybe something's happening. Laid back down for a couple minutes. They picked up to the point that they were uncomfortable enough for me that I wanted to go bounce on my ball,

(23:41): but I was like, I'll let my husband sleep a little bit. It doesn't feel like it's much. I can still talk. You can still walk. I'm fine. So he bounced on the ball for probably another 20 to 30 minutes. My son was actually in bed with us, and at that point, he realized mom wasn't in bed anymore, so he woke up, which woke my husband up. And so my husband comes out and I'm like, yeah, I think I'm starting to feel contractions. And he's like, okay, do you want to start timing them? And I was like, yeah, we can start timing them. And then he goes, well, I'm going to take our son downstairs to where my in-laws stay.

(24:12): so he took him down, he came upstairs, he's like, oh, do you want to take a bath? You took a bath before you went to the hospital last time. And i'm like

(24:18): Yes, that's great. So he runs me a bath. I get in the bath, I actually fall asleep in the bathtub. So he comes, he's like, oh, I thought you were timing them. And I'm like, it's okay. I'm all right. But then right before I got out the bath, I felt like a really strong wind. So I was like, okay, things are picking up, trying

Dr. Nicole (24:40): To pick up

Vincia (24:41): Okay, but I'm still looking. I'm like, it hasn't even been a full two hours. I don't want to go just yet. And so I go into the room, start getting dressed, they start picking up faster. So he starts timing them. He's like, okay, I think we need to start getting ready. So I start getting ready to go to the hospital. One thing that I love that my husband learned from our previous doula and our current doula was the counter pressure. So even though I was contracting, he was able to put the counter pressure to my hips, which kind of helped relieve me through them. And then at one point I asked for our Tim's machine as we were getting ready to go in the car, so he put that on me. Oh,

Dr. Nicole (25:23): Did you use that the first time or was this something you,

Vincia (25:26): I had bought it the first time, but I was afraid to use it. But I did have some sciatic nerve pain with my daughter during the pregnancy. And so since we had it, I'm like, okay, I'll try it.

Dr. Nicole (25:38): Got it.

Vincia (25:38): And so by that time, I wasn't afraid to use it.

Dr. Nicole (25:40): Got it, got it.

Vincia (25:41): So he put that on because he's also trying to go and pack the car and get the car ready. And during that, he calls my doula, and at one point she goes, okay, this is great. It's early labor. This is a perfect time to get a nap in. And I tell him, I was like, tell her no, tell her we're past nap stage. These feel like they're active contraction. I think I'm in active labor. We can start heading out. But then there was a wave that hit where he's like, okay, you're going to get up. And I was like, I can't stand up right now. Give me a minute to stand up. And I remember, it's funny because my husband, he's an engineer, so he doesn't have maybe the most emotional support, but it was really funny afterwards because

(26:23): I just remember a really strong contraction hit, and I kind of looked at him and I was like, I don't know if I can do this. And he goes, well, you don't have a choice. I was like,

Dr. Nicole (26:34): Thank you.

Vincia (26:36): I was like, thank you. I was like, you're so motivating. Thank you so much. He's like, well, kind of. We're doing this. So the contractions are a part of it. Oh,

Dr. Nicole (26:49): Bless his heart.

Vincia (26:50): But during, at least he's applying pressure the entire time. And then I started to feel a little bit pressure towards my butt. I was like, is that what they were talking about the first time? I'm not sure. But I'm like, okay, maybe she's just getting lower. So I stand up and I'm like, okay, I'm pulling my pants up to go. He's trying to also help me get dressed, but I'm

Dr. Nicole (27:13): Like, okay,

Vincia (27:13): I need to stand up to get my pants all the way on. I get my pants to my hip, my

(27:19): Water breaks, and as soon as my water breaks, I go, I feel ahead. And he's like, what? I was like, I feel ahead. Do you see a head?

Dr. Nicole (27:30): Oh, immediately,

Vincia (27:32): Yes. I leaned back for him to see, and he goes, mom, dad, Taos.

Dr. Nicole (27:38): Oh my goodness.

Vincia (27:41): My mother-in-law must have super speed. Somehow she got, there's every towel in our house and in our room, there was no questions I asked, no other communication. it was just

(27:52): She runs up with every towel in the house. By the time she comes in, I'm like, I think I want to push.

Dr. Nicole (27:57): And was the head out, or was

Vincia (27:58): It, I think she crowned and it kind of popped. You see the top, you could see the top of her head. And so I kind of leaned back on the edge of the bed and pushed two times and he caught her.

Dr. Nicole (28:13): Oh my gosh,

Vincia (28:15): Yes.

Dr. Nicole (28:16): Okay. So how was he during that time? How were your in-laws? I need to hear all of it. We want to know all of it. How was everybody managing in that moment?

Vincia (28:26): So I think part of what happened is that it happened so fast. My husband was for a second trying to do three different things. He's like, we live in Chicago. It's winter. It's a couple days after the coldest day of the winter happened. So he's trying to warm up the car. He is trying to get the bag in the car and then also check on me. and

(28:47): So I can't think it was a freeze frame because the water breaks and he kind of sees that, and he's like, okay, I can tell that he's rummaging to get me another pair of pants, but the instant I say, I feel the head, do you see a head? Everything kind of just Pauses.

(29:02): It's okay, what are we going to do next? It's too late, I think in our like, okay, we can't go to the car right now. Not happening. We're obviously not making to the hospital hospital's 30 minutes away from

Dr. Nicole (29:16): Us. Oh yeah, no, that's not happening.

Vincia (29:18): So we're doing

(29:19): This. We kind of just looked at each other, okay, we're doing this.

Dr. Nicole (29:23): Okay, did somebody call 911 or anything

Vincia (29:26): After we did, I think it's also working in healthcare. My brain's like, okay, nine one one's going to call. They're going to triage, send you to EMS. That's going to take a while. They'll get here. They're going to take me to the nearest hospital. That's not necessarily my hospital. So that's probably the downside of knowing too much. I ran through that scenario very quickly and I was like, okay, her head's already here. Let's see what's happening. I think our doula was also on the phone with us at the time, and she had a home birth with a midwife not too long ago. So I felt a little bit comfortable since she was on the phone. And so I'm like, okay, we're going to push, and as long as we feel good, we'll see. We'll take it from there. My mother-in-Law and Father-in-Law were so good. Everyone came upstairs. But then my father-in-Law took my son and kind had him in the room across from ours My mother-in-Law was great with getting the towels and having everything ready. My husband admitted shortly after he was, he thought he was going to drop her because it was so he caught her and then immediately passed her off to my mother-in-Law who has the towels,

Dr. Nicole (30:36): Right?

Vincia (30:37): And then I kind of see him kind of running wrong, like, okay, I need to, he's like, what do I need to do? And I'm like, well, we did skin to skin, so let's just let her lay on my chest.

Dr. Nicole (30:45): And when she came out, was she crying?

Vincia (30:47): Yeah, she started crying. It's funny, my mother-in-Law was like she said after she's like, I was ready to see if I needed to spank her to see. And then we had my nursing cart and baby carts set up in the room already, and so it kind of had a bulb on it. And I think with my son, he came out so fast, he swallowed a lot of amniotic fluid on the way out. So my husband grabs the bulb and I see him go and he tries

(31:13): To see if anything comes out. There wasn't a lot of liquid that came out, so we're like, okay, so maybe she didn't swallow as much. She started crying immediately. She pinked up really quickly, eyes opened to close. I was like, okay, so she feels good. And then we did the check with me like, okay, now what's going on

(31:34): Here? So I'm like, okay, how's my bleeding? And my mother-in-law, not only is she fast with bringing us the towel, she's also apparently super fast with cleaning because it happened so fast that my floors are clean, the towels. And I'm like,

Dr. Nicole (31:50): How?

Vincia (31:52): Because I'm looking, I'm like, am I bleeding too much?

(31:56): Did I poop? And my husband was like, yeah, but it's fine. We brought it up and I'm like, I was like, okay, that's fine. Now your mom's seeing everything really close now. Can't get any closer than that. But then we asked because I kept my placenta from my son too, and we did supplements. And so my doula asked if we had a big bowl and we had this huge metal mixing bowl. And so she's like, okay, put that underneath you so that it can catch your placenta. And then I was like, oh, wait, I have to do that with my son. I didn't remember. I remember, oh, we're going to deliver the placenta, But

(32:33): Nothing that I had to really do on that end. But I knew that if it didn't come out within a certain time period, then it's higher chance of retention and then there's risk associated with it. And so we have the silver bowl, and my umbilical cord was also very, very long Because

(32:54): I remember my daughter was up here, and then I could still feel like my cord, and you're like my knee. I'm like, okay, this is longer than I remember. And so then I had to stand over the bowl. My mother-in-law kind of held the bowl and I had to push, but I actually had to actively push to get the placenta. I felt like I pushed more to get my placenta outfit to get my daughter out. So that probably took another maybe 10 minutes with some breaks to get that out.

Dr. Nicole (33:23): Okay. And then did you tie off the cord at any point?

Vincia (33:26): Yeah, so we tied it out. Actually before I delivered it, I think we tied it off. That was a part of my husband running around like, well, what do I do with it? My doula is like, well, you need something to tie it off with, and then you need something very sharp. And so he found ribbon, this pink ribbon, and he's in the bathroom, and I couldn't tell what he was doing until after, but I guess he's dousing it in alcohol to sanitize it. And so he kind of ties it off in two different places. He cut my son's cord, so he remembers what it looked like, and he cuts right through the middle of those. But the cord was so long, it was about the length of her leg is

Dr. Nicole (34:07): What

Vincia (34:07): He left, is what he left behind because he didn't want to get Closed, right?

(34:13): So he's like, I don't know what I'm doing. He's like, okay, I'll cut. I don't want to get too close here. Because pretty long we delivered it. My a doula came there at that time, since she does the supplements and everything, she was going to take it with her, and she kind of flipped it over a couple times To

(34:29): See if there may be anything that's missing or if there's anything retained. And she's like, okay, it looks solid. And then I think she made me something to eat during that time, and then I was like, okay, I'll go to the bathroom and try to shower. And I was like, well, I want to go to the hospital to make sure that I'm okay. I

(34:46): Did tear the first time, so I'm like, did I tear this time? I feel a little stinging, but I'm not sure. There's a lot of things going right now. I want to get us checked out, make sure that she's okay, make sure that I'm okay as well. So we kind of shower, try getting dressed again and actually make it to the hospital.

Dr. Nicole (35:06): So you just drive to the hospital

Vincia (35:08): After Starbucks? This is that. So first contraction was at 12:40 AM I had pushed her out by 3:30 AM so I'm like, I need a little, I was like, I need something to drink. And

(35:28): My husband's like, I also very much so need coffee because he basically woke up, ran a bath, and then had to deliver baby shortly after.

Dr. Nicole (35:38): Yes, yes, yes. Oh my goodness. So what time was it when you got to the hospital?

(35:44): We Got to the hospital probably closer to six 30. We ate. I wanted to make sure that I could breastfeed her, so I let her latch do skin to skin before I even got up to do anything. So once I made sure she was fine, she also, her first poop was pretty quick and a lot bigger than I remember my sons, because the first time I actually got dressed, I looked down, I'm like, there is black stuff all over the place,

(36:20): Black slimy stuff.

Vincia (36:21): And so she had pooped everywhere, and so I had to get changed again because also she's still scrunchie newborn, so the diapers doing whatever it's going to do on her. And so we did that again, changed her diaper and then was finally actually able to go, I think of course, I called my mom in between that time, and it's funny, I go, mom, we didn't make it to the hospital. And she goes, what do you mean? I'm like, we didn't make it. And

(36:49): She's like, she's like, why are you playing? She's like, why are you playing? Are you kidding? This early in the morning? I'm like, no, I'm serious. And I go over to the bassinet that's set up in the room already the room was prepped for a baby to come home anyway. And I'm like, no, she is right here. And she's like, that baby has been here for, I'm like, no, that baby just got here. People see pictures of her and they're like, did you give her a bath? Did you do this? And I'm Like,

(37:11): No, I didn't. I think since she wasn't in the birth canal for so long, she came out and she was obviously in her sack for a while, So

(37:20): She came out pretty clean, And

(37:23): Her head was also perfectly round because came, once again, she wasn't, She

(37:27): Came so fast. Everyone's like, what do you mean? You just had this baby an hour ago?

Dr. Nicole (37:32): Oh my goodness. So what in the world did they say to you when you walked up to the hospital with a baby and were like, I had my baby a couple of hours ago.

Vincia (37:45): So I actually called them before to get options. I'm like, what should I do? I wanted to know what are some signs that I should be looking for? Am I too calm because I'm in shock? Let me get it from the actual medical professionals. And so that's when they were like, well, you could go to your nearest hospital. You could come here. You might not need to go anywhere. You could just schedule appointments with a pediatrician. I'm like,

Dr. Nicole (38:16): Really? Was this the doctor that you were talking to?

Vincia (38:20): It was like the nurse, the triage line. Okay. Like I'm going to go option two.

Dr. Nicole (38:30): Right. Okay.

Vincia (38:32): Yeah.

Dr. Nicole (38:34): So then when you get the hospital were

Vincia (38:37): they Were confused,

Dr. Nicole (38:39): Exceedingly, exceedingly.

Vincia (38:40): They didn't know what to do with the baby. I kind of sat her, then I took her out the car seat and I'm holding her. Yeah. So we get there, we have to check in at the front desk, and usually it's like we're having a baby. And I'm like, I had a baby at home on accident. And they're like, what? I was like, I

(39:00): Had my baby at home on accident. I want to make sure that we're okay. So the nurses are like, okay, we'll bring you back. So I take the baby out the car seat because it's my newborn and I'm holding her on the bed and triage, and they're like, can you put her somewhere? And I was like, which just lets you know they're used to baby and mom, And

(39:22): They take the baby and kind of put her in the corner of the room, and I'm kind of like, eyes darted just had baby. I'm like, that's where my attention is. Their

(39:30): Focus being triaged for labor and delivery, it's on me. So they're checking my vitals. They do a vaginal exam, they do the stomach exam, which I'm actually happy because it wasn't the exact pressure from when I was actually in the hospital. So this is a nice change, not as bad. The doctor comes in, she checks and she goes, well, the bed probably would've caught you as well as I could have in this circumstance because you look great. You

(40:00): Didn't tear. Good job. And she's like, okay, but I'm going to step away because I've never had this happen before and I need to figure out what we do with you next.

Dr. Nicole (40:11): At least she was honest, because normally people, if that happens, they call 911. So they come in by ambulance, and then we at least sort of even then, I mean it is still like, okay, okay. So then what happened after that?

Vincia (40:28): She went and talked to someone, looked up maybe some of the hospital policies, and she's like, well, it's the holiday weekend. You look good. They hadn't looked at baby. And I was like, can you check the baby? Like her umbilical cord's really long? Can You Or something do something like that?

(40:47): So they started looking at the baby, but during that, she's like, okay, your plan was to have a baby at a hospital, so you would've gotten these certain things like the 24 hour testing surveillance since that was your plan and you've been getting your care that way, let's move forward with that.

Dr. Nicole (41:03): ok

Vincia (41:03): are you okay with us admitting you? And we're like, okay, we didn't bring our bags. So someone had to bring those later on. But I'm like, yes, we can get admitted because her 24 hour tests were going to be at 3:00 AM the next day was Christmas, so no offices were going to be open That Sunday or that Monday. So

(41:19): I'm like, okay, we'll stay just so that she can get everything that she needs. And then also just surveillance. She's like, you look fine. You look great, but Let's

(41:31): Just have you both here together. We wouldn't send you home and keep her here. So they admitted us upstairs, and I felt like we just had to tell our story over and over again. They're like, I've never had this happen to me before. They're like, mom, you're good. If you want to walk around, you're independent. Do you Want Food? We're Good to go.

Dr. Nicole (41:50): Okay. Okay. So then how long did you stay in the hospital afterwards?

Vincia (41:55): We stayed for one day, so we left the afternoon on Christmas day.

Dr. Nicole (42:00): Okay. Okay. All right. And then how did they do her birth certificate?

Vincia (42:06): So it's funny, they filled it out at first and then we got it, and it's actually our address. So even though they filled it out and sent things in, it got to sent to another county. We live in a separate county from the hospitals county, so they submitted it with our address. The person that delivered it is my husband's name, so it's one of my favorite parts. I'm like, so my husband's address me as a doctor from now on.

Dr. Nicole (42:41): Oh my goodness. And then I guess, how was that postpartum period? Was it otherwise uncomplicated? Did you breastfeed? What was that like for you?

Vincia (42:50): Yeah, so I was able to continue to breastfeed. The only thing that was slightly strange is that during the holidays, it's like different staff. So the pediatrician that saw us was a NICU doctor, and so those babies have to eat more consistently. At one point, I think my daughter had ate three to four times within that first 24 hour period, which I thought was really good. I'm like, okay. He goes, oh, your baby's not eating enough. You're starving her. And I'm like, wait a minute. What? He wanted to run blood glucose on her as a result. And so they kept coming back normal, but he did a series of three, and the nurse finally said, she's like, he sees NICU babies, and so they have to, so that's why he's heightened, but it's not your baby situation.

Dr. Nicole (43:37): Sure. So

Vincia (43:38): Other than that confusion, like you need to feed her every hour, and I'm like,

Dr. Nicole (43:42): You haven't seen a newborn in a long time. That's not how, yeah. Okay.

Vincia (43:48): But she latched fine. We're still breastfeeding to this day.

Dr. Nicole (43:52): Okay. All right.

Vincia (43:53): It's a little bit different when you have a toddler at home, but luckily had really good supports through that. He actually, the only downside is he became a daddy's boy during that time because he's like, I think it probably shocked him that one minute he was in the room with us sleeping. He went out, came back, and then there's another person in the room

Dr. Nicole (44:17): That this person wasn't here before. What

Vincia (44:19): Happened? Where did that come from?

Dr. Nicole (44:20): Right, right, right.

Vincia (44:22): He's like, mom, you must have did it. So I'm going to hang out with dad for now.

Dr. Nicole (44:28): Okay. Questions. How do you feel about all of it?

Vincia (44:32): So I think the first time it went so fast that I didn't have the time to realize that it was shocking until later on. I think it helps that me and my husband are calm people and that it was our second, he goes, if it was our first, I probably would've had to go watch YouTube. And I'm like, Sir,

(44:51): You cannot pause during. That's not how it works. No, we're not going to do that. So that was one part of it. And then even talking to my husband afterwards, it is not, luckily everything was healthy, but it still is a level of shock or trauma that comes with being put in that circumstance very quickly. And so it took afterwards, I talked to him, I'm like, how did you feel about it in that moment? Because it's like, that's your daughter. That's your wife, and now all these things are in your hands And you

(45:21): Weren't expecting them to. So we talked to those things to reconcile what happened because it's great that it turned out to be a beautiful experience to us, but since it wasn't expected, there are feelings and things associated with it that are important to be recognized versus being like, okay, this is all great and rainbows and sunshine.

Dr. Nicole (45:41): Absolutely. Absolutely. So then do you all plan to have other children? If you do, would you consider a home birth? Now,

Vincia (45:51): I am borderline, so I'm like, let's wait until our son gets into kindergarten, and I'll know for sure if I'm just like, my pregnancies are easy, my labors are easy, let's have another one. Versus do we actually want to have three children? Like I could do this all day if this is how it's going to be, But

(46:09): I would consider a home birth this time, just like, okay, I feel confident in what me and my husband have with any one another. So bring in a midwife and a doula to support that at home I think would be great.

Dr. Nicole (46:21): Gotcha. Gotcha. Okay. So then as we wrap up, what is your single favorite piece of advice you would give to someone who's expecting a baby right now?

Vincia (46:30): Yes. One of my favorite things that I learned after my son was just because something is natural to us doesn't mean that it's easy. So just because things feel difficult or hard, it doesn't mean that you're doing something wrong. So kind of lean into that experience so that you can learn from it and develop what you need to. That was really important with breastfeeding because it's like, well, it's not happening. It's like, well, it's natural, but it's not easy. So you have to learn your baby's learning. It's the first time that either of you have done this. And the same thing with having a natural birth. Contractions are hard. They are painful, they're not comfortable, but there are things that you can do to get through them. So just knowing that just because you're feeling pain or uncomfortable to a certain extent doesn't mean that you're failing in any way. Okay. How much of this is healthy for you to continue to push through to make it happen?

Dr. Nicole (47:34): Yes. Yes. Excellent advice. Excellent advice. So where can women connect with you? You can say nowhere if you're nowhere.

Vincia (47:41): Well, I have Instagram. I feel like most millennials, so if anyone wants to connect with me, I am CIA Kimari on Instagram.

Dr. Nicole (47:49): Okay. Alright. Well, thank you so much for sharing your story. That is absolutely. That's just crazy. Like I said, most people when they do that, they freak out. They call 9 1 1 and it sounds like y'all were just like, okay, everything looks okay. Kind of take it step by step. Yes. It's

Vincia (48:07): My father-in-Law, right afterwards, he's, I think we were like, I walked around and get something. I think I'm trying to get stuff ready to go, and he's like, you all just delivered a baby. And you seem very like, I'm like, I'm like,

(48:22): Maybe it's Shaq. I don't know.

Dr. Nicole (48:24): Right, right. All right. Well, again, thank you so much, Vincent. I so appreciate you sharing your story.

Vincia (48:30): Thanks for having me.

Dr. Nicole (48:39): Wasn't that a crazy episode or crazy birth story I should say? I'm so glad everything turned out well for them. They just threw everybody for a loop. Adeline just decided she was going to come into this world how she was going to come into this world, and I so appreciate CIA taking the time to share her story. Now, after every episode when I have a guest on, I do something called Trin Nicole's notes why I talk about my top takeaways from the conversation. So here are my Dr. Nicole's notes from my conversation with Vincia one, she said her doctor kind of gave her a bit of a hard time about weight and pregnancy, and sometimes we don't do a great job of really recognizing the real and actual risk related to weight and pregnancy. So if you want to know the truth, and I actually had to check myself on this because I did it once and then realized that I didn't do it the right way the first time.

(49:30): So check out episode 180 6 of the podcast. That's dr nicole rankins.com/episode 180 6, and in it I talk about weight and pregnancy and obesity and pregnancy, and you can just get the real information there. I know I learned a lot and you may learn a lot too. Second thing I want to go over is what are recommendations for when you go to the hospital? This can be tricky. It's not always easy to know exactly when labor is ramping up, when labor is going to happen. So I'm going to give you some general guidelines. Of course, speak to your own doctor or midwife about your own unique specific situation because things may change if you have any issues or if you live far away from the hospital. But in general, for your first baby, you want to have contractions that are five minutes apart or less that are all strong enough that they're taking your breath away and they are doing that for two hours before you go to the hospital.

(50:26): So if some are strong and some are not, then it's not time to go to the hospital. If they're five minutes and 10 minutes and eight minutes, it's not time to go to the hospital. You want two hours of consistent, five minutes or less, all strong enough that they're taking your breath away before you go to the hospital. So that can be quite some time depending on how things ramp up. Okay. Now, if you've had a baby before, you can shorten that time to an hour, but same thing, you want them to be consistently strong during that time and five minutes apart or less. Now, if you feel like things are ramping up faster than that and it's been less than an hour and you're like, whoa, something's happened, this is intense. Things are moving really fast, and by all means, listen to your body and go to the hospital.

(51:10): This doesn't mean you can't go to the hospital. These are just general guidelines. So listen to your body. If things feel like they're ramping up pretty fast and you feel like you need to go in, then go in. Now as far as your water breaking, everybody's going to tell you something a little bit different. I tell folks that you don't have to come to the hospital right after your water breaks. As long as the fluid looks clear, there's no blood. It's not brown or green, which can be indicative of meconium, the baby having pooped inside. So if the water's clear, you can wait a period of six hours or so before you come to the hospital. Some people say you should come sooner if you have the GBS bacteria so we can get antibiotics started. And actually some folks will say, if you don't have GBS, you can even wait for 24 hours before you go to the hospital, but check with your own doctor or hospital.

(51:57): But just because your water breaks, that doesn't mean you have to immediately rush to the hospital. Okay. Point number three, and this may feel a little bit disconcerting or troubling, but I'm just going to be honest. Some laborers will just go fast. They just go fast and you can't do anything about it. It can feel quite overwhelming actually, because it's like some people say, oh, it'd be great if my labor went super duper fast. It can actually feel really like a lot because when it happens that fast, you have zero control over what is going on just happening in your body, and you don't have any say. It's just ramping up really, really fast. So some labors just go fast and there's not a whole lot you can do about it. Some babies are just meant to come into this world on two wheels coming around the corner, so know that you didn't do anything wrong.

(52:57): There isn't anything that you could have done differently. It just so happens that some laborers will go fast. There are a handful of babies that are just going to be born when they're born, wherever they are at that moment, whether it's at home, whether it's in the car, whether it's in the lobby, some labors just go fast. Okay, and the fourth point I want to mention is doulas. I loved how she talked about she was really excited to have a doula and really had a great experience with a doula. And one of the things that I think is great about doulas or great doula is a doula will teach your husband how to help you best during your labor and birth. They are not just there for you, there for you and your So I love how her partner was also a really strong advocate for doulas as well, because really that's what doulas should do is help both you and your partner have a great experience during birth.

(53:57): If you want to learn a step-by-step process on how to choose a doula where I go through questions you can ask, then check out episode 218 of the podcast, which is a step-by-step process on how to choose a doula and inside of the birth preparation course. I also have a really nice handout that you can use when you're interviewing doulas. The birth preparation course is my online childbirth education class that gets you calm, confident, and empowered to have a beautiful birth. That's just one of the many handouts that come inside of the birth preparation course. And you can check out the birth preparation course at drnicolerankins.com/enroll. All right, so there you have it. Please share this podcast with a friend. Also, if you love the podcast, will you please leave me a five star review in Apple Podcast? It helps the show to grow, helps other people to find the show. I also love to hear what you think about it. So if you enjoy the show, please leave me that five star review. I would appreciate it. And you can connect with me outside of the show on Instagram. I'm on Instagram at @DrNicoleRankins, who can get tons of great pregnancy and birth information there as well. So that's it for this episode. Do come on back next week and remember that you deserve a beautiful pregnancy and birth.